Etiquette for Ballroom, Swing & Salsa Dancing

One of the things that is rarely covered by a dance instructor in Ballroom, Swing or Salsa dance class is “dance floor etiquette”.  Some common social dance questions are:

What is the proper way to ask someone to dance?

Can anyone ask anyone else?

Is there a protocol for turning someone down?

How do you let potential partners know you are interested in dancing?

Let’s establish some ground rules to make it simple.

Rules For Requesting a Dance

1. Anybody Can Ask Anybody.

In today’s day and age, a woman asking for a dance is a common occurence.  (Remember that it’s a dance, not a date!)  For either gender, it’s best to be aware of clearly exclusive couples unless you know for certain that they are interested and available to dance with others.

2.  Respect Partners’ Dance Time

You may enjoy dancing with a particular person, and it’s ok to request a second dance, but it’s NOT ok to monopolize their time throughout the evening.  Asking for a second dance in a row is acceptable if you only made it to the floor for a portion of the current song.  Then you have to move on.  You can ask that person for another dance later in the evening – be sure to space out your requests.

3.  Ask Lots of People

The best way to improve you dancing – is by dancing!  Getting out on the floor and staying there with a variety of people, not only is good practice, but it’s great exercise and much more fun that sitting on the side watching.  In addition, you have the opportunity to get others to feel good about themselves!

4.  Pay Attention

Asking another to dance means risk – the risk of someone saying no!  Look for people that are close to the dance floor and look like they want to get onto the dance floor.  Avoid someone in deep conversation, or someone standing at the back of the room unless you know the person.  Watch body language as well – not every shoe fits and there will be some people that would rather dance with someone else.  If you approach and they turn away, don’t take it personally, and look elsewhere for your next dance.

Rules for Accepting or Declining a Dance

1.  Always Accept a First Invitation to Dance

Someone has built up the courage to ask you to dance, it’s only decent to accept.  If there is some glaring reason that you can’t accept (you danced the last 10 dances and need a break, it’s a Waltz and you don’t Waltz) clearly explain WHY you can’t dance with them in that moment, and then FIND THAT PERSON LATER when you are able to dance.

2.  If You Decline a Dance, Sit That One Out

If you’ve told someone ‘no’ for a dance, then don’t dance.  It’s insulting and painful to be rejected only to have the person you asked to gladly dance with another.

3.  The Only Three Reasons to Say No

Dances last about three minutes, being polite and gracious is easy in three-minute doses.  Having said that, there are only three acceptable reasons to decline a dance invitation after the first:

1. Fear of injury.
2. Inebriation.
3. Intolerable hygiene.
4. Inappropriate body contact.

The Golden Rule of Social Dancing

All other rules fall behind one simple rule of thumb:  Be polite and treat others the way you want to be treated.  Social dancing is only fun if people are social.  Do your part to help keep it fun!